Hi ho, hi ho.....
Well this is it…..
Tomorrow I officially return to work, uniform and all. It has taken me 12 months and 5 days, 2 surgeries, 4 chemotherapy sessions and 5 weeks of radiotherapy to get here but I have done it!
FINALLY some normality, a sense of normality anyway. Just gotta fit into the new team that I’m with now and get to grips with being a community nurse.
One thing I know for sure, I feel like being a patient for that amount of time is going to make me a better nurse….I am NEVER going to tell my patients it’s just a sharp scratch……. IT IS NOT!! I guess I can also help patient’s going through what I’ve been through, because I can actually say to them “I know exactly how you feel!” and mean it.
I’m excited to be going back but also very anxious as well. Mentally I feel ready but physically is another matter, but I won’t know if I’m physically ready until I try I guess.
What a whirlwind of a year we have all had, but it’s onwards and upwards from now on, live each day and make it count, oooo just had a thought….. a wage in my bank account will be VERY nice too!
Without a doubt kicking cancer’s ass was the scariest, most debilitating thing I’ve ever had to do, it strips you of your identity, and you lose body parts, your hair, your independence, your ability to control your own life and the certainty of life. It festers inside you and constantly pecks at your head, there’s no escaping it. This is where you have to FIGHT and I mean fight with everything you have got, even when you think there is no fight left in you, GET UP & FIGHT!
By doing this and fighting my ass off, I’m still here, my girls still have their mum and my family still have me. It’s also changed me as a person too, I no longer take anything for granted, I’m grateful for everything and everyone who is in my life and from now on I intend to make mine and my girls lives count every single day!!!
Also a massive thank you to everyone who has been in touch and visited me while I’ve been ill. Huge thanks to my family for looking after me/putting up with me and a HUGE thanks to my gorgeous darling girls who were the main reason I had to fight that bastard big C!!
Be happy, be healthy